Learnings From My First Ever Media Pause//Part Two

By Tuesday, my husband and I both noticed that we were feeling more calm and peaceful than usual. The change was so profound, it reminded me of the way my emotional state changed when I quit drinking. 

So let's talk about that damn smart phone. 

I felt the urge to pick up my phone SO MANY TIMES. 

When did I notice it the most? During just about every transition in my day.

Here's my normal morning routine: wake up, poop, drink a glass of water, meditate for 20 minutes. Sometimes I journal a bit. 

After that is when I normally would start my first cycle through all the things I “check” on my phone.

And that’s when the urges begin.

I felt the urge to check my phone when I returned from my morning run, right before I got in the shower, immediately after I got out of the shower, while I was putting on makeup, while I brushed my teeth, while I heated up water in the kettle, before I sat down at the computer.

And once I was on the computer, pretty much every time I had a gap in my train of thought. 

What’s the problem with this? SO. MANY. THINGS. 

If I’m picking up the phone every time I make a transition, what does that mean? 

Imagine an athlete in a triathlon, and in-between each leg of the race, someone thrusts a phone into her hands, asks her to scroll through Instagram. 

Or imagine a composer in the middle of creating a symphony, and after every few measures, she’s given a magazine to flip through. 

Every time I abruptly jerk myself out of the present moment with that dang phone, I give myself reality whiplash.  I can’t get into flow state, and what a waste of time having to reorient myself again and again.

One of the major breakthroughs I had with my sobriety was during a personal finance course, when I was taught that my money represented my time. The  time it took for me to earn the money to begin with,  AND the freedom of retirement, which I could earn by investing my money.  Since my time was my most valuable resource, the lesson concluded, that’s what made my money so valuable. 

That part of the lesson was my breakthrough moment with sobriety-- I’M SUPPOSED TO VALUE MY TIME?!!

I literally did not realize I should value the hours of my life. And we all know that alcohol and drug use are one of the worst time wasters ever. 

I had a similar realization during that week-- that my attention has the same value as money, because it also is a representation of my time. 

What did I give my attention to during that week since I wasn’t giving to whoever happened to post in my social media feed? 

To My Sober Girlfriends. 

To friends, via text and phone calls. 

To my family--for the first time ever, we sent Easter cards to all of our nieces and nephews to arrive before Easter (even in Spain!) 

Also to my husband. We had more and better sex than usual during that week, and richer conversations. We felt more energetically in tune with each other. 

One night, we held each other on the couch (clothed- haha), watching the silhouettes of the trees as the sun went down, and just talked. On a normal week, we might have been sitting next to each other on the couch, each of us mindlessly scrolling, as they say. Mindlessly scrolling. 

So is that it? Is that what I learned from my media pause? Peacefulness, better concentration, more attention to things that really matter? 

Yes, AND there was one more surprise in store for us at the end of our five days.

Because this wasn’t just about my phone-- it was also about podcasts, music, and books.

Something very interesting happened that Friday. It may sound a little weird to you, but I'm going to go ahead and share.  

You can read about that in Part 3.